Kansas

I frequently find places to spend the night in my RV last minute. Hear me out. If I roll up to the place I’ve planned to stay and it smells like dying animals, there are needles on the ground, loud noises, or a group of sketchy-looking men who all turn and stare at me as I drive in, I’m not staying there! Fortunately, I have many apps to find places – Harvest Hosts, The Dyrt, Airbnb, Google Maps, and HotelTonight are a few of them. Let me know if this is something you guys would like to hear more about, I’m happy to share. However, that’s not what this story is about. This story is about the only reason I would ever return to Kansas again, Shiloh Vineyard and Winery. 

Driving through Kansas is surreal.

There is nothing but fields, industry, and wind farms for hundreds of miles. If you haven’t driven through a wind farm before, imagine a mile-high white structure with three cycling propellors. Then imagine hundreds of them, staggered like an invading army of whirring sideways helicopter robots, standing at attention for miles. 

There is nothing between the road and the wind so it pushes you back and forth. The force is even worse if you’re driving an 11 ft tall monster like Big Bertha. If I was talking to you on the phone for this part of the trek, I might have hung up on you to focus on the steering wheel that began to fight back with each heavy gust. 

I was exhausted from fighting Bertha’s wheel and pulled over at a rest stop to scour my apps for places to stay. The Wicked Witch of the West’s theme song played in my head as the wind shook my parked RV. I found a nearby Harvest Host and began the remainder of the journey. This is how I found myself in WaKeeney, Kansas at Shiloh Vineyard and Winery. 

The drive from the highway to Shiloh was over a mile through dusty farmland. I quickly thanked God for my recently acquired habit of never letting my gas tank go below ½ full. That’s a story for another time.

I texted the owner through the Harvest Host app as I pulled up and he emerged to let me through the gate. 

He apologized. He was headed to dinner and couldn’t show me around tonight, but asked, “You’ll be around in the morning, right?” Harvest Host hospitality usually comes with a tour of their establishment and an expectation that you’ll spend $20 on whatever they are offering. I haven’t been disappointed with this arrangement yet. It usually results in trying something I never would have picked out for myself, like Mangelista sausage or moonshine margaritas, also stories for another time. I chose a spot at a far end of a field past a newish Winnebago and a vintage orange RV and made myself comfortable for the night, or so I thought.

As soon as it got dark the gusts of wind turned into the loudest noise I’ve ever heard.

The lightning storm was so loud and terrifying I couldn’t tell if I was petting my dog to comfort him or myself. I texted my dad to ask if I was safe. He said I was fine since the tires were rubber. This did little to comfort me as I could feel the heat from each bolt of lightning that crashed and my hairs were standing on end with the electricity. I started filming the storm on my phone through the window, thinking if I did make it out of this unscathed it would make for a good story. I can’t emphasize enough how loud the lightning was. Even with my hands over my ears, it penetrated my bones. It’s moments like this when you realize you believe in a higher power. I was begging for my life. 

There have been times before when I haven’t much liked living. Going through opioid withdrawal after my herniated disc healed, was one of those times. Not being able to eat for months after my heart was broken is another. Each time I remember my stepsister is dead, and how she died, is still an ongoing battle. This, however, was not one of those times. This night I wanted to live. I had finally started to find the real me with this new nomadic lifestyle. I wasn’t ready to give it up. 

Spoiler alert: I lived to tell the tale, with a message for you to not wait until you might be edging your mortality to fully live your life. 

I didn’t sleep that night, even after the storm had stopped. I felt powerful. I felt filled with electricity and grateful for each breath. These lungs were filling and emptying with newly found purpose and intensity. It’s funny how we question suffering and death when they are the two things that make us live life the way it's meant to be lived and appreciate the things we would otherwise take for granted. Without them, life would be meaningless. 

Slowly the dark skies morphed into a peaceful sunrise as if the storm had never happened.

6:00 am central time, felt like an hour later to me. I took my Goldendoodle Fitz outside to relieve himself. I was grateful he hadn’t peed on me in fear during the night. Scanning the land I saw unbothered donkeys grazing within the paddock and wondered where they had been during the storm. I walked a bit further and saw the harvest host owner doing chores, also unphased by the previous night’s storm. We started chatting and he ensured me we had been perfectly safe and that he would have gotten us if we needed to evacuate. Well, you could have said that before! I digress. I walked around with him as he explained he was retired and inherited the farm from his family. He was mostly interested in it being a self-sustaining entity, rather than taking handfuls of cash.

Please note: anyone getting married who wants an incredibly inexpensive, adorable wedding venue, please check this place out. In my opinion, they don’t charge enough. 

I regret nothing. 

After touring the grounds, he showed me the winery and started to pour. I tried a semi-sweet red and instantly knew this is how I would be spending my $20. Then the semi-sweet white was also insanely good and so was the coffee-infused dessert wine. I ended up spending almost $100 and was officially tipsy at 7:00 am, on a Wednesday. I regret nothing.  Except for not buying more bottles…YOLO.

If you’ve already read my first post, you know I hope to write a book about my misadventures. So, whether you are an old or new friend, please let me know your thoughts in the comments. What would you like to hear more or less about? Also, If you haven’t already, get new posts sent to your inbox, by subscribing here.

<3 Kathleen